Wednesday, December 15, 2010

New One

My flow is sick like diarrhea
Words are contagious like gonorrhea
Am strapped with metaphorical weapons like North Korea
Curing the world of crappy rappers decease--panacea

My rhymes are futuristic
The style i use, is quite artistic
The shit i write is just novelistic
That's why with a pen, i go ballistic

My skills stretch like elastic
I burn rappers like they plastic

Get to know me and i'll seem sarcastic
Start kickin it with me, and you'll know why am fantastic

Just got in the game
And already own fame
Everyone knows my name
And the game will never stay the same

To think, just six years ago, i changed my location
Traveled across the globe to a new destination
With hours of writing, and many hours of dedication
I am ready to take over the music industry of this nation

I ran the race, redefined success
Reached all my goals, but nonetheless
Am still advancing with a full court press
You can't keep up with my progress

I don't know what the future has in store
All i know, is i'm not done yet, and there is more
I will dominate the nation shore to shore
Strapped and ready to go, marine corps

Until then, I will keep on keeping on
Create an image of self, that'll last long after i'm gone
Make a bright future for myself and someday my son
When you see my tombstone, only then will you know that am done

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Pages of Life

I don’t know what happened to me
I’m not who I used to be
I don’t see things way I used to see
I look at myself and I don’t know if its me
Its like morality gone outta the window
Or is it just me tryin to fit in bro?
I am searching, searching for myself
But loose course, when I wanna be someone else
I don’t practice what I preach
My life goals are now too far to reach
So I give advice to others, try to teach
But got nothing to show for it, my life is a bitch
I say one thing, but do another
Try getting closer, but keep getting farther
Until it’s like why the hell do I bother?
I like to think of myself as havin a good life
But I suppose the past is like a scar from a knife
You try to forget
But can’t help to regret
Wishin it was different somehow
So you go, and try to make up for it now
In turn it affects your tomorrow
And then you sit there, full of sorrow
In a crowded jail cell
Too drunk to realize, once again you fell
And this time you fell hard
Now gotta go back to the fuckin start
And every time you gotta bet back at the beginning
Its like entering the field in the next inning
Stamina and strength are not as before
So you gotta work harder, and more
No rest, until you hit a homerun
But its harder to run, when your strength is gone
Cause the previous run, got wind knocked out of you
Best is the best thing you can really do
But this best is worst than before
Because you’re not in shape anymore
Your mind is not clear, your focus is gone
Now you just want the game to be done
Now it’s not about winning
You hope you can make it to the end of the inning
I tried to construct me a future, but lost the blue print
Tried to finish a race, but can’t sprint
Tried to flip to the next page, but its glued to the one before it
So I tried to unglue it, but all that did is tore it.
Now that part will forever remain unknown
Until I finish with the book, and the plot is shown
The life I missed out on, is now sealed
Until many pages later, when the plot is revealed.

Thursday, October 28, 2010


What the fuck am i supposed to do?
I am torn between two worlds, both of them seem true
On one hand i got, my life that now is called past
I lasted there a year, got fucked up at last
Locked up, broke my entire bank
My head came down, my heart sank
Like Hannibal, when he realized he was outflanked
I had to deal with it, so i just drank
It wasn't the best idea, i ever had
But it helped me out, it wasn't bad
Except for the part, of my fam feelin sad
But i was a young, and a stupid lad
People came out, and really helped me out
Now i was back on track to becomin succesful, no doubt
But lookin back, all i wanna do is shout
I miss them all days, i miss my crowd
My throat is dry, I haven't had a drink in a while
I am loosing my grind, becomin outta style
Not havin a car, makes me feel like exile
It seems all this shit, just turnin me vile
Loosin my temper, gettin outta control
Walkin around like a pissed off troll
Bein alone is takin its toll
I keep on movin,but about to fall
Fuck everything, fuck morality
That shit aint real, it aint a reality
The rules are soundin like a technicality
But makin me stick to 'em is straight up brutality

I really appreciate, what your tryin to achieve
I am workin hard, tryin to believe
But in my head all i wanna do is leave
Or may be ask you to pull down your sleeves
I don't wanna say, that what you did is a waste
But this is not where i belong, it just aint my place
You live on planet earth, i belong in space
That year is in my passed, but not erased

Saturday, September 4, 2010


I never live in the past, i just move on

What happened has happened, now its gone

I don't look back, i don't share any tears

I just look ahead, turn back on my fears

I never have problems or worries

What happened before, is now just a good story

I hope your not offended

But your chapter has just ended

Am turning the page, am writing a new story
I don't feel bad, i don't say sorry
Your a memory now, that i won't forget
But a memory without feelings or regrets

I look back someday, and remember the good times
We were closer than ever, i was hot and you were a dime
We did our own thing, we had our fun
When we were watching setting or rising sun
We also had fun in between
Heard a lot, but we weren't seen
What you do, when you do it
Pop it, bring it back, or just screw it
You were amazing and you knew it
That's why i loved when you do it.
And all the things you would tell
When you talked i was under your spell
The eyes although silent, never quit talking
And those legs, dam i loved to see you walking
Chills would come over me, at every single touch
And every time, time would stall like a car with a broken clutch
And we shift our gears, put it in park
Reverse it a little and ignite the spark
Them were crazy nights
When we were blinded by love like some headlights.


Then the times have changed
Our nights got fewer and shorter
Our feeling for each other, just grew colder
And then both did things that were just over border
We could have talked bout it,
We could have stopped for a bit
But we were too busy to even sit
Times change human beings
But people change times even more
My life is just not the same as before
Ever since we left, our separate ways
I just don't feel the same about my days
Memories of us, leave me in a daze
But i know that its just a faze
It will go over and both of us will move on
Memories fade, when timer beeps and dinner is done

You got yourself a man
I got myself a lady
I am selling out shows
You volunteer at Haiti
Our lives separated, went in different directions
Now the past consists of small tiny sections
In each of our hearts
Where one memory fades, a new one starts
So steadily the memories we once created
Either become lost or just outdated
And we just delete them
Without much thought
And in place of those fun times
All we get is dot, dot, dot.
Until even that space is also filled in
And the new memory begins!


Friday, August 27, 2010


This one right here is a short one, bout my dad. I love my pops...but during the early years i was pretty pissed at him and this just reflects my memories.

I wake up and wonder if it’s a dream
Cause nothing has changed, or so it seem
I hop out ma clumpy bed
Hit the shower and get fed
I wish I didn’t live
I wish I was dead
My heart turns to anger
My eyes turn color red.
Why would this happen
What the hell have I done?
Was I unworthy
Was I a horrible son?
Why the hell did u give me life?
Just so u can take it with one stab of a knife?
What was about me, that u hated so much
That you left and left me to watch
Them throw you in an empty cell
What the fuck am I supposed to tell?
To my sister, your daughter
That she has an asshole for a father?
Do you realize the situation I am in?
I am full of anger and hurt but ur the one with the sin
This is not how its supposed to be
I am supposed to have a father, you see
I was made to be a child till I grew
I wasn’t intended to be an adult at the age of two
If you only knew,
how much I grew
since the last time ive seen u
But you don’t care
Looking at me with that cold stare
Mothafucka how dare?
You leave us alone
Your only daughter and your only son
Did you think what will happen to us?
Cause we didn’t have anyone we could love or trust
Left alone fending for ourselves
Trying to survive and caring about no one else
Our life wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great
When you chose that path, you have sealed our fate
And now its too late
Its passed the overdue date
Now I probably will never see my dad
It makes my sister sad
But bitch it makes me mad
You’re the only thing we’ve ever had
And now I don’t know if your alive or dead!

Fathers, you were given a responsibility
You have special gifts and special ability
All your children ask for is love and sincerity
Cause no child wants to be a child of charity.
We want you to help us grow
Teach us to walk and talk and throw
Baseballs around at a park
Help us find our path, give us that special spark
That turns into light, when everything else turns into dark

Monday, August 16, 2010


I was born in Russia, where I lived for thirteen years before getting adopted along with my sister into an american family. These lyrics were written about our mother, who has struggled with drug addictions that proved to be fatal to her life. Although this is a scoop from my personal life, i know a lot of people would be able to relate to these lyrics.

The year was nineteen and ninety one
A mother gave birth to her only son
Alcoholic and drug addict, she held her kid
Thinking back and feeling sorry for all the things she did
Those nights, when she was trashed beyond belief
Those days, when she couldn't leave
Her life of constant addiction
Listen closely, cause this aint no fiction.
Closely she held her newly born
And you could of almost sworn
That she looked ahead, to a new life
But she didn't change and died by a knife.
Cause as soon as she was out of the hospital door
She left behind everything to which she swore.
To start a new life, away from alcohol and drugs
To replace those idols with something as simple as hugs.
She had the desire, bud didn't have the will
And once again, everything from there went downhill.
Back into the partying scene,
She once again lived as a fiend.
This continued for five more years
And constant unsatisfaction left her in a lot of tears.
She used the source of the problem, as a way to cope
Dope to release her of alcohol, and alcohol against her dope.
Living the life from a drink to a drink, she didn't stop long enough to think
That the same baby boy, in that hospital room
Might be left without a mother very soon.

We all mess up, and we are given chances
To progress forward, to make minor advances
Sometimes its hard, and we all strife
But not to take those chances, can cause you your life.
And if you just don't care, if your heart is to empty and bare
Then may be you should get a pair, and grow some serious hair
Cause really you aint being fair
To those who actually care, bout yours and their welfare.
Stop telling yourself all the fucking lies
Sometimes you gotta step back and realize
That when your buried, its more than you that dies.
So make a right choice, and do it quick
Cause it might have been your last choice as we speak.

Money got scarce, addictions got worse
She constantly needed a new money source
As the desperation grew, her morality decreased
Until it finally just seized to exist.
Taking advantage of the situation
Her friends didn't take a moment of hesitation
Offered her money, for sexual favors
And too stupid to think, she considered them her saviors.
Time passed, and things got harder
The mother fell further and further
Now she was sleeping with dudes she didn't know
An addict turned into a hoe.
Her family tried to help her condition
But the mother didn't have any ambition
She lost the ones that loved her
Until she didn't have anyone anymore.
Now all she had, was her two young babies,
Something else to replace her addiction, may be
But that was not the case
The kids went without food for days
So she can satisfy her ever wanting desire
And she met more men, but all of them ended up being liars.
Her condition worsened, doors started closing in
Life became harder for the mother fiend
Now she was at the point of no return
Far from that mindset of the day her child was born
And although she was torn, she closed the final door.


She met the wrong kind of people
The kind that thrive on purely evil
And they promised the will give her the doze
But first she had to take off all her clothes.
By now it was too late
Because in their minds, the guys have already sealed her fate
Nothing out of ordinary, happened at first
They all proceeded to commit intercourse
When it was all done, the mother asked for her pay
"Bitch what the fuck did you say?"
Then all at once, they started attacking
All you could hear was her screams and bones cracking
But they were at a place where no one lived for a mile
So all her screams of agony were futile.
Then one of the guys, pulled out a knife
He snickered, as he saw fear in her eyes.
As she realized she was going to die
She stopped screaming and started to cry
Her heart started racing, her throat became dry
Then she felt a sharp pain in her stomach, and proceeded to die.
That was the last day of her in this world
But the life has just begun for her son and young baby girl.
They were hundreds of miles away as she took her last breath
As she stared in the eyes of her new savior--death
As i think about that moment, I almost wanna cry
Because those little kids who were left in this world
Were my sister and I.